Sometimes it's hard to grieve

If you hadn't heard, my computer died a couple of weeks ago. I laid it to rest trying to resuscitate it, but the darn thing lost it's fight after 6 years of life. I decided to donate it's organs to an external hard drive. (Get an external hard drive TODAY!) The hospital charged me $300 for extracting precious photos, tax information, resumes and Itunes. It was a lot more than I was ready to pay for, but it was worth it. I did mourn for a few days over the loss. I felt such a disconnect from the world. What really was going on out there? How many emails did I have? Would I be missing a crucial evite to RSVP too? Did someone want to be my friend on Facebook? I really didn't know what to do with myself. My husband would ask me to Google something and I would go to the computer, but it wasn't there. I needed to look up a phone number and I actually had to get out the phone book. What was my life becoming?

A week went by. I found myself more relaxed and less dependent on my computer. Reflecting back on our history together, I realized it was like a drug to me. I found myself reading more, paying more attention to my family and finding other ways to fill my time. I couldn't check emails every 5 minutes and it was nice. I did go to my parent's house one of the days to check emails. I was happy to see that Pottery Barn, Sephora and J.Crew had missed me. They never gave up on me and new I would find a way to keep in touch.

How was I going to fill this void? I had to make some tough decisions because it was time to pay bills online. I needed to get another computer, but where to start. You know you need a computer to buy another computer. Confusing! Before I started my search, my sister was nice enough to lend me her old computer which was the exact same computer brand and model. I was thrilled and overjoyed. She shipped it to me from Philadelphia. It would be traveling a long way and I couldn't wait to see it. It seemed like the waiting would never end. I waited a lifetime. (It was from 3pm to 5pm and he delivered it at 6pm. Whatever!) I did almost kiss the UPS guy when he rang the door bell. I couldn't open the box fast enough sifting through all of the Styrofoam peanuts and bubble wrap. It was mine all mine. It booted up so fast which took me by surprise. I clicked on Outlook and there they were, 167 emails. I was back baby. Ooh! Someone wants to be my friend. I guess the grieving is over.